Other family members might want to help, but if they’re unable to let old issues go, you might find that you’re not getting the help you and your senior need the most. Try some of these ideas.
Do What You Can to Keep the Situation Calm
Family dynamics can be volatile and when you’re talking about a situation involving your senior and what might be her changing health, things can get even more volatile. Try not to deliberately push buttons or set off conversational bombs. If you show that you’re working hard to keep everything as calm as possible, other family members might just try to follow suit. Remember too that if you only let them know what is going on when you’re angry, they might start to see every situation that way no matter what.
Maybe You Can Find Some Common Concerns
Even if you don’t agree with your other family members about much else, chances are pretty good that you agree that you want the best for your senior. That could be the best ground to start out on to find more commonalities. When you find and share common concerns, that makes it easier to get along. No one has to be best friends, but you want to avoid as many arguments as you can.
Avoid Assigning Blame, Because That Will Blow Up
Blame is a great way to keep things incendiary. If you’re trying to keep everything calm and get everyone moving in the same direction, though, that won’t fly. You might know who is to blame for what, but does it need to be pointed out right now? Probably not, in the grand scheme of things. Save all of that for some other time when it won’t completely derail what you’re trying to do for your senior.
Get Clear about What Your Senior Needs
There might just be a lot of help that your senior needs and that’s what is really important here. In order to express those needs to other family members, it’s vital that you’re super clear about them yourself. That’s going to make explaining them that much easier. If they’re going to pitch in, they’ll need to know how and why to do so.
Something else to remember is that not all family members are going to be able to step up the way that you want them to. If you’ve done all that you can and they still prefer drama, you would be far better off getting help from home care providers. There’s a lot less drama when you go that route and you’ll actually get the help that you need.